With my clients, I talk a lot about the importance of follow through and honoring one’s desires and plans. I talk about living purposefully. I talk about scheduling pleasure and rest. I talk about trusting yourself. All really good things to talk about. :)
And for the most part, I practice what I preach.
Except for all the ways I DON’T (cheeky grin). Like…
Consistent prayer/meditation.
30-min lunch breaks.
Taking time to notice pleasure all around me.
Working outside when it is sunny.
Limiting my sugar intake.
Exercising.
Reading.
Planning romantic things with my husband.
Creating social media content.
THESE EMAILS.
Etc.
Etc.
Etc.
Look, I am a smart woman. I know how to make a beautiful plan for my life. My Google calendar is full of all the things I want to accomplish each day, color-coded and labeled impeccably. My schedule is a good balance of work, rest, play, and connection. But the reality of my Google calendar and my actual life don’t always line up. Let me just say it now- sometimes, I don’t follow through.
When I notice the time block for “yoga”, I sometimes think, “Ah, I’ll do that later.” Or, “Maybe tomorrow.” When I see the early morning reminder for prayer/meditation, I often tell myself “Yesterday was a hard day. Just sleep a little bit more.” When I see that it is my time to plan a romantic date with my husband, I sometimes decide, “Ah, let’s just go for a walk. That’s all we need.”
Look, I get it. This is normal human behavior. This is just how our human brains work. AND, it is also the thing that is keeping me from some of my greatest joys.
Because the fact is, our brains aren’t concerned with our ultimate pleasure and deepest joys. It is mostly concerned with instant gratification, which usually leads to taking the easy way out. Even if I put up some initial resistance and tell myself I should…, it will come up with some whopper excuse to convince me that I deserve easy. I deserve a way out. After all, look how hard I work. Look how much I have already done. Look how far I have come already. (Anyone else have those thoughts?)
But that is simply NOT TRUE!
What I deserve is to live a full life. What I deserve is to have more pleasure. What I deserve is to love more; have more joy, more connection. What I deserve is to show up for myself as much as I do for others. What I deserve is to give myself a moment of rest to reset. What I deserve is to give myself every opportunity to experience all that my life has to offer rather than taking the easy way out.
But this doesn’t just come naturally. It means making a thousand conscious decisions, within a thousand, tiny micro-moments every day. It takes me being committed to myself and my desires. It takes me deciding that I deserve MORE than what my brain is offering. It takes believing that I am not simply missing out on the hard, I am missing out on the GOOD.
And let’s be honest, the worst part of all of this is how I then speak to myself after the fact. When I fail to follow through with my plans, I quickly make that mean I am less than. I say things like, “You aren’t responsible. You can’t ever do what you set out to do. You can’t be trusted.”
But what is actually true (and I deserve to tell myself the truth.) is that I am made for so much more! I am MORE THAN, not less than.
So, for all of us ladies who sometimes fail to follow through with what we want for our lives, let us collectively refuse to take the easy way out. We all deserve more. We ARE more.
Look at that calendar of yours today and say out loud, “I deserve to have all these moments of my life! I will not take the easy way out.”
Faith Hoskins
Further Up Coaching www.furtherup.org
PS- If you feel like you are ready to stop the rat race and start following through with your plans and desires, sign up for a free discovery session (https://go.oncehub.com/FaithHoskins) to learn how to rewire your brain out of those negative patterns and start living the life you truly deserve.
Comments